Oh hello, did you hear the news? Hocus Pocus is being remade.
No, thank you!
No one asked for this!!!
Why is this necessary? The classic 90’s film Hocus Pocus does not need to be remade. How dare they?! It stands on its own and it has survived the test of time as a Halloween classic. We’d be okay with a sequel. Of course, it would have to be with the original cast. But to remake it altogether?! Them’s fighting words.
Reports are saying that this new version, which will NOT include any of the original cast or the original director Kenny Ortega (director of other Disney films like High School Musical and Descendants) will be a TV movie. We’ll most likely see it on the Disney Channel or Freeform.
No one asked for this modern remake. I don’t need to see a Winifred arguing with Siri, Mary flying on a swanky tech vacuum, Sarah saying “on fleek” or the sisters discovering face filters. The film is great as it is. Who could even play the Sanderson Sisters as well as Bette Midler, Sarah Jessica Parker, and Kathy Najimy?! Good luck finding that kind of talent.
Hocus Pocus is from a happier and simpler time. It is beloved and cherished by many of all ages. And, it’s more popular today than ever! Walt, if you’re listening somewhere, save us from this disaster.